Now Playing: Brad Paisley - The Cigar Song
One day little Johnny got an assignment from Mrs. Pandolfini. The assignment was to have the difference between theory and reality understood by class tomorrow. Now Johnny, being a bright kid, understood his father knew everything. He would go and ask him...
"Dad, what's the difference between theory and reality?"
Dad said, "Well, it's hard to explain, so let me illustrate. Go ask your sister if she would sleep with Brad Pitt for 2 million dollars."
Johnny said, "OK, but that's a little weird"
To sister, Johnny said, "Hey sissy, would you sleep with Brad Pitt for 2 million dollars?"
She giggles and said. "Oh yeah."
Johnny returns to his father, a little more confused. His father tells him it may become more clear if he asks the same thing to his mom.
To mom, Johnny asked, "Would you sleep with Brad Pitt for 2 million dollars?"
Mom looked around, and after deciding it was clear, she said, "Absolutely."
Johnny was befuttled. He returned to his Dad, and said, "Dad, they both said yes, but I still don't get it."
His father said, "Well Johnny, in theory we are sitting on a goldmine, but in reality, we're living with a bunch of whores."
Sunday, August 28, 2005
Friday, August 26, 2005
Beating Drums
Tonight we went for sushi at a local sushi restaurant. It was great; tables were about a foot high, and they make you take off your shoes before you enter the dining area. I had Yakitori and Gyoza.
When we were leaving the restaurant, we could hear what seemed like a drumline that you would hear at a festival. It wasn't a complex beat, but the beat was such that it made you think of primitive dancing. I decided to investigate. I entered the alley alongside some Okinawan's, giving me the impression that I was going the right way.
What I saw was about 50 Okinawans with basedrums, executing a dancing drumbeat. They would raise the drum hit it, take a step lower and raise, hit it, all synchronized.... It was obviously a practice-session for an upcoming parade. My buddy told me that they wear eleaborate costumes when the ceremony actually goes.
They reminded me of dwarfs or hobbits dancing gleefully, like drunk drummers. It was pretty interesting...
When we were leaving the restaurant, we could hear what seemed like a drumline that you would hear at a festival. It wasn't a complex beat, but the beat was such that it made you think of primitive dancing. I decided to investigate. I entered the alley alongside some Okinawan's, giving me the impression that I was going the right way.
What I saw was about 50 Okinawans with basedrums, executing a dancing drumbeat. They would raise the drum hit it, take a step lower and raise, hit it, all synchronized.... It was obviously a practice-session for an upcoming parade. My buddy told me that they wear eleaborate costumes when the ceremony actually goes.
They reminded me of dwarfs or hobbits dancing gleefully, like drunk drummers. It was pretty interesting...
Sunday, August 21, 2005
Thinking about school
Now Playing: The Wallflowers - Sixth Ave Heartache
Now that pre-school is over, I have the desire to learn.
Now that elementary ed is complete, I want to cram some knowledge.
Now that middleschool is gone, I could use a Social Studies lesson.
Now that High School is in the past, I need some Algebra refreshing.
Now that I've graduated college, I genuinely want to learn.
The shameful thing is, I cant say "after preschool was over, I wanted to learn".
It's only after I am 'done.' Now I want to have 'skills' (Numbchuck skills, bowhunting skills, ...). Now I want to know stuff that would relieve my need to use google for definitions/background information to everything.
Oh, and I wish I would have double-majored.
Now that pre-school is over, I have the desire to learn.
Now that elementary ed is complete, I want to cram some knowledge.
Now that middleschool is gone, I could use a Social Studies lesson.
Now that High School is in the past, I need some Algebra refreshing.
Now that I've graduated college, I genuinely want to learn.
The shameful thing is, I cant say "after preschool was over, I wanted to learn".
It's only after I am 'done.' Now I want to have 'skills' (Numbchuck skills, bowhunting skills, ...). Now I want to know stuff that would relieve my need to use google for definitions/background information to everything.
Oh, and I wish I would have double-majored.
Friday, August 19, 2005
More from Japan
This is the more 'Americanized' portion of Japan. In fact, they call it 'the american village' or 'Mihama' (sorry if I bastardized that). There's good sushi, good pool tables, and some other things to see. Here's my photo-impression:
I shot this photo while watching an impending storm and rising tide steadily creep in on my afternoon of reading on the beach. I am reading Ernest Hemingway's 'Islands in the Stream'.
That's all that I'll provide. I will disclose that there is more to come. I am working on a photo-album of my journey. I can't give them all away...
I shot this photo while watching an impending storm and rising tide steadily creep in on my afternoon of reading on the beach. I am reading Ernest Hemingway's 'Islands in the Stream'.
That's all that I'll provide. I will disclose that there is more to come. I am working on a photo-album of my journey. I can't give them all away...
Wednesday, August 17, 2005
Typhoon Bands
Now Playing: A Perfect Circle - Judith
Here's a tardy post; I meant to post this, but needed time to find a terminal.
Before entering the plane, the load-master asked if anyone was prone to car sickness. He explained that there was a typhoon 200 miles from our destination, and the destination itself was in the bands. (Expect turbulance). The doc came around and handed out dramamine. Knowing that I needed to work upon landing, I bit one in half, and handed the second half to the guy next to me.
Now imagine this: You're in the Pacific Ocean feeling like Jonah. You feel like him because the plane your in looks and rides like a whale. It's fat, slow, and cumbersome. It makes the squeeling sounds. There are air pockets that drop the plan about 20 ft instantaneously, giving you that 'Demon-Drop' feel. You're 400 feet off the coast of an island, hoping the pilot can see the landing strip. You certainly can't see anything.
You know for a fact that the whale is tipping the left wing down, then the right, then the left, trying to stay on target. Then you feel the back of the whale slide out to the side. (Your plane is coming into it's landing sideways. Now, the other Jonah's in the plane look to you for strength, stability, and even for guidance. You gasp, but force out a laugh and raise your fists in the air, all the while saying to yourself, "We are going to die." What came out of your mouth to everyone else is, "hoorah, aint this fun?"
The whale's wheels touch down and you're pleased you may just crash on deck and get third-degree burns. You know for a fact the FAA would have a fit if they knew a whale, nick-named 'Sumo', had landed on an island, during a typhoon, at roughly the equivalent of Rusty Wallace's speed any Sunday afternoon.
Here's a tardy post; I meant to post this, but needed time to find a terminal.
Before entering the plane, the load-master asked if anyone was prone to car sickness. He explained that there was a typhoon 200 miles from our destination, and the destination itself was in the bands. (Expect turbulance). The doc came around and handed out dramamine. Knowing that I needed to work upon landing, I bit one in half, and handed the second half to the guy next to me.
Now imagine this: You're in the Pacific Ocean feeling like Jonah. You feel like him because the plane your in looks and rides like a whale. It's fat, slow, and cumbersome. It makes the squeeling sounds. There are air pockets that drop the plan about 20 ft instantaneously, giving you that 'Demon-Drop' feel. You're 400 feet off the coast of an island, hoping the pilot can see the landing strip. You certainly can't see anything.
You know for a fact that the whale is tipping the left wing down, then the right, then the left, trying to stay on target. Then you feel the back of the whale slide out to the side. (Your plane is coming into it's landing sideways. Now, the other Jonah's in the plane look to you for strength, stability, and even for guidance. You gasp, but force out a laugh and raise your fists in the air, all the while saying to yourself, "We are going to die." What came out of your mouth to everyone else is, "hoorah, aint this fun?"
The whale's wheels touch down and you're pleased you may just crash on deck and get third-degree burns. You know for a fact the FAA would have a fit if they knew a whale, nick-named 'Sumo', had landed on an island, during a typhoon, at roughly the equivalent of Rusty Wallace's speed any Sunday afternoon.
Yes, A Pirate
Now Playing: Jimmy Buffet - Son of A Sailor
Funny how 24hrs can change everything. A maragrita has almost the same affect. Winter mornings are not something for general pleasure, but there's something about the way you have to live. Here's the flipside:
You shove the boat off at eight AM, with the sun already starting to burn. The water is at low-tide, and egret on the farthest bank seems so concerned with the tiny whiting that he doesn't recognize your presence. Nor do you give him much time, though in the back of your mind you realize the beauty of the banks, the grass, the egret, and the air. All you need to do is silently let out the anchor and tune the radio. To offset the immediate sweat you've relented to the humidity, your wife hands you a Corona, complete with lime, and she giggles. She calls you 'baby' and you know the day will be just fine. The cast-net goes out with a splash, and you pull in a few shrimp.
Yeah, South Carolina's alright too. :)
Funny how 24hrs can change everything. A maragrita has almost the same affect. Winter mornings are not something for general pleasure, but there's something about the way you have to live. Here's the flipside:
You shove the boat off at eight AM, with the sun already starting to burn. The water is at low-tide, and egret on the farthest bank seems so concerned with the tiny whiting that he doesn't recognize your presence. Nor do you give him much time, though in the back of your mind you realize the beauty of the banks, the grass, the egret, and the air. All you need to do is silently let out the anchor and tune the radio. To offset the immediate sweat you've relented to the humidity, your wife hands you a Corona, complete with lime, and she giggles. She calls you 'baby' and you know the day will be just fine. The cast-net goes out with a splash, and you pull in a few shrimp.
Yeah, South Carolina's alright too. :)
Monday, August 15, 2005
Indiana
Now Playing: Devils and Dust - Bruse Springsteen
It's a shame that Mr. Springsteen extracts such a peculiar emotion when you declare that his music suits you. People think of a scratchy voice singing "born, in the usa, I was...", jeans with holes in the knees, and an overall - fake badboy - thing.
But old Bruce and I see eye to eye on the slower paced songs, songs such as "the ghost of tom joad," "Nebraska," and "Devils and Dust." They're settling. They evoke the feeling that life is what it is. Even if it hurts. But you don't feel the pain, you just know it can hurt.
So I've been thinking about Indiana. Never liked living there as an adolescent. Haven't lived there for quite some time. But today, in thinking, I've discovered something besides family that I like about the place. I like seeing "INDIANA" in all-caps on my license-plate. Even when the license plates were mainly a peach color with sunset on farm-land motif. Indiana is a 'rough around the edges' word and I fancy it to be a symbol of just that kind of place. Do not think 'Indiana Jones.' Its more of a feeling you get when you see that word on a license-plate at 4 in the morning at a gas station in December. It shows through the grey-filth that covers everything. It represents more than the 4 degree wind-chill you just fought to return to your car. It means getting home to loved ones, and enjoying warm nights indoors. It also means there will be fishing in the spring.
I am trying to figure South Carolina out in the same way. If I don't, I may not stay.
It's a shame that Mr. Springsteen extracts such a peculiar emotion when you declare that his music suits you. People think of a scratchy voice singing "born, in the usa, I was...", jeans with holes in the knees, and an overall - fake badboy - thing.
But old Bruce and I see eye to eye on the slower paced songs, songs such as "the ghost of tom joad," "Nebraska," and "Devils and Dust." They're settling. They evoke the feeling that life is what it is. Even if it hurts. But you don't feel the pain, you just know it can hurt.
So I've been thinking about Indiana. Never liked living there as an adolescent. Haven't lived there for quite some time. But today, in thinking, I've discovered something besides family that I like about the place. I like seeing "INDIANA" in all-caps on my license-plate. Even when the license plates were mainly a peach color with sunset on farm-land motif. Indiana is a 'rough around the edges' word and I fancy it to be a symbol of just that kind of place. Do not think 'Indiana Jones.' Its more of a feeling you get when you see that word on a license-plate at 4 in the morning at a gas station in December. It shows through the grey-filth that covers everything. It represents more than the 4 degree wind-chill you just fought to return to your car. It means getting home to loved ones, and enjoying warm nights indoors. It also means there will be fishing in the spring.
I am trying to figure South Carolina out in the same way. If I don't, I may not stay.
Saturday, August 13, 2005
Idiosyncratic?
Now Playing: Weezer - Say it Aint So
I've been tagged by Colin to identify and explain 5 idiosyncrasies of mine. In no particular order, here goes nothing:
1. I like to work on boats more than I like to sail or ride in them. As much as my mind likes to escape on a sailboat, I have more fun rigging one, or fixing one up, than I do in cruising around on it. I have a hard time relaxing that much. I'll work on it.
2. I don't play games I can't win. Never have. I will work hard enough at anything I deem as necessary in order to win. I am a poor-sport. I even told my wife that she loses in Checkers everytime because 'I am out to annihilate you.' I am getting better though (so I guess I am winning over the tendancy)
3. Like Colin, I silently repeat lines that I say. I have a habit to analyze how it came out, the inflection, and if I could improve in order to have a better affect. How weird...
4. Like Penny, I swallow my gum before I know what happens. I have a habit of kneeding it a little, and swallowing just a bit at a time. I am so bad, my wife won't give me anymore gum. Hope those stories about it sticking in your stomach aren't true!
5. Like Penny, infidelity on TV or movies pisses me off. I won't watch it. I always think that TV should please me, not make me wonder why the world sucks as much as the people that infest it. Let's go back and watch "Fraggle-Rock."
It was a feeble attempt at identifying some weird characteristics. I bet my friends could help me out.
I've been tagged by Colin to identify and explain 5 idiosyncrasies of mine. In no particular order, here goes nothing:
1. I like to work on boats more than I like to sail or ride in them. As much as my mind likes to escape on a sailboat, I have more fun rigging one, or fixing one up, than I do in cruising around on it. I have a hard time relaxing that much. I'll work on it.
2. I don't play games I can't win. Never have. I will work hard enough at anything I deem as necessary in order to win. I am a poor-sport. I even told my wife that she loses in Checkers everytime because 'I am out to annihilate you.' I am getting better though (so I guess I am winning over the tendancy)
3. Like Colin, I silently repeat lines that I say. I have a habit to analyze how it came out, the inflection, and if I could improve in order to have a better affect. How weird...
4. Like Penny, I swallow my gum before I know what happens. I have a habit of kneeding it a little, and swallowing just a bit at a time. I am so bad, my wife won't give me anymore gum. Hope those stories about it sticking in your stomach aren't true!
5. Like Penny, infidelity on TV or movies pisses me off. I won't watch it. I always think that TV should please me, not make me wonder why the world sucks as much as the people that infest it. Let's go back and watch "Fraggle-Rock."
It was a feeble attempt at identifying some weird characteristics. I bet my friends could help me out.
Thursday, August 11, 2005
Updating For Tom
As I'm sure you've noticed, Tom has been unable to update lately so I'm taking over for him. He is now in Okinawa at an Air Force Base (Kadena)and will be for the next month. The Air Force is more strict on what sites you can access.....and blogger is one they don't like. He is working 16 hours days and not liking it. I guess the Marine Corps computers aren't up to par with the Air Force system so he's doing a lot of updating and hot patching- things I have no clue about. He's learning a lot though. And is exhausted.
A Marine he worked with here in Beaufort is now stationed in Japan and let him borrow one of his cars. He has a van for him, a van for his wife and another car so he's letting Tom use it.
Tom should beable to update this weekend. He can do it at the library I think. It closes every night at 6:00 pm and he never gets out of work before then.
And that's the latest......
The Wife~ Alison
A Marine he worked with here in Beaufort is now stationed in Japan and let him borrow one of his cars. He has a van for him, a van for his wife and another car so he's letting Tom use it.
Tom should beable to update this weekend. He can do it at the library I think. It closes every night at 6:00 pm and he never gets out of work before then.
And that's the latest......
The Wife~ Alison
Tuesday, August 2, 2005
IPOD
Now Playing: Ghost of a Good Thing - Dashboard Confessional
I received an IPod in the mail today. Thanks babe! I never thought I would have one. They're way too expensive. But I guess I am loved, and for that I am happy. What a boost in morale. Just what I needed. I feel loved. Never spend that much on me again though. I would settle for cookies!
I received an IPod in the mail today. Thanks babe! I never thought I would have one. They're way too expensive. But I guess I am loved, and for that I am happy. What a boost in morale. Just what I needed. I feel loved. Never spend that much on me again though. I would settle for cookies!
Monday, August 1, 2005
The Distance Between Us
Lauren is getting married Sept. 17th. I won't be there. In talking to my family, I've realized that I haven't really been around in almost 8 years. I've already missed Easters, Independence Days, Thanksgivings, Halloweens, etc. Somehow missing Lauren's wedding is having more of an effect on me than all that. I guess it's because it's a life's milestone, not merely another routine event. I'm happy for you Lauren; I wish you the best. I guess I know how EVERYONE felt when they missed mine.
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